Couples Dance

I love it when I get a chance to Top women.  It doesn’t happen nearly often enough.  This weekend, however was a deliciously squishy exception when I got to cuckold a man as the person who made his wife cum on my Feeldo while he watched.  The little bitch could only lick my asshole as I showed him what his wife looked like when she wasn’t faking her orgasms.

Last time I got to do anything similar is when I had a man who was a pet and terrified his girlfriend would find out.  Unbeknown to him, I seduced her as well, made her into  little cunt lapping pet of mine.  I used to hiss into each one’s ear as I was fucking them, how the other lived to cum on the very same strap-on.  I laughed my ass off for two weeks while neither one admitted to the other if I was telling the truth.

The day I got them both together was fucking amazing.  God, I gotta do that again some time soon.

You need a Mistress like Shayna, but you can’t have her. Of course, you can beg for scraps of her attention and call her Femdom Phone Sex line.

Hmmmmm A Little Tease and Denial Tonight, I think

I had fun last night making a guy hump a pillow.  It’s been a while since I’d done it, but I was feeling playful.  He was so pussy-whipped and desperate to smell and taste just a little bit of pussy.

Not being a real man, of course, he couldn’t get a girlfriend, but I told him he could pretend, putting his pillow under his hips and pounding away at his goose feather girlfriend.

I giggled my ass off as the little loser puffed and grunted, giving it to her like a real man.. or at least like he imagines a real man would.  It’s ok, soon enough, he’ll be seeing what a real man fucks like.

Doesn’t this all sound compelling? Not as compelling as Mistress Shayna’s Hypno-fetish phone sex.

Creamy Humiliation

Had fun this weekend… got to fuck my lover and drip his cum into a bitch-boi’s mouth.  My pussy still tingles remembering the way my lover called him a cum sucking faggot as he lapped it up like a good little cum-dump.  And the little loser ate it up in more than one way.. he couldn’t keep his hand off his clitty-cock while he sucked that man-juice from my gooey gash.

God, we’re gonna have fun with this new one.  He’s a proper painslut and seems to have no limits.  Oh, he has things he’s reticent to do.. like eating my lover’s cum from me, and he’s even more resistant to sucking the jizz straight from the source, but I’m sure we’ll be working right the hell around that in no time.

I’m sure I’ll keep you all posted.

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Tonight, I met the butchest guy ever to walk around with a pair of tits.

He was just kind of metrosexual looking, clean and well groomed, wearing distinctly men’s clothes, no make-up.  But damned if he didn’t have a perky pair plainly visible under the black shirt and leather jacket.  He didn’t come at me like a sissy, just like a guy who happened to have tits.  I gotta say, he didn’t act much like a bitch when he was tryin ta sex me up with a hand under my skirt and his raging hard, and not at all small, cock against my ass as he ground into me as we kissed.

He was kinda sexy as a guy, and his breasts were nice.  He asked for my number.  We’ll see what happens.

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A Very Merry Un-Birthday to me

Ok, so it’s been a while and you’ve been suffering from the loss of me.  I understand, my little homoshayniacs, but there was nothing to be done about it.  First, my  DSL router crapped out on me and… well.. then it was my birthday and I wanted to take the week off.

What?  You don’t think being waited on hand and foot is hard work?  I’ll have you know I have a severe case of whipper’s shoulder.  It’s like tennis elbow, but it pays better, and it’s painful for both of us.

Your worries are over now though, poppets.  I’m back and I will not abandon you again.  Well, not completely.  I mean, it *is* turning awfully sunny out and it’s really hard to spend time with you when the waves are calling my name.

Tell you what, buy me something sparkly to hold my attention and I’ll stick around a while longer.

Speaking of presents.. love and teasing kisses go out to the men who sent me birthday greetings and gifts.  I have a very sweet amount of money in my NiteFlirt account for a girl who’s logged in only one time this month.  And especially to Danny, who gave me a shiny new red laptop, to mach the shiny new red phone from M, which matches the adorable red cell phone I speak to you fuckers on.

I got a shit load of other gifties I’m pleased with, but not pleased enough to thank each of you publicly… next time, try harder.

OK, poppets… the Mistress is in.

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Mistress Lauren Here

Mistress LaurenHello all!! I am just stopping by here to let you all know that Mistress Shayna will be back in a few days at the most. I know you have been going insane without her, as she has been gone these last few days, but not to worry. Once again, she is coming back. She has waged a war on the evil old modem and it died a horrific suitably painful death, so now the wait is for the new fresh pretty and obedient modem which will be in tomorrow or the next day to replace the old evil dead one.

Be good all you little ‘Shayniac Poppets’, she will be back to training and humiliating you before you know it!

Mistress Lauren
The Mistresses Elite

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One Week Til Mistress’ Birthday

For those of you who dare, I’m running a Mistress’ Birthday special. From May 3, to May 10th, I’m offering 5 free minutes to all pets who will shave their pubic hair into the shape of a balloon and dye it a festive color. For you boys who are already shaved bare, a red permanent marker will do. You may draw it right on your pubic mound.

That’s right poppets, you can use your cock as a coupon and speak with me for five minutes. I’ll require proof, of course. You don’t think I’d take the word of a pet with an erection, now do you? If you want to play, you’ll have to take a picture of your pretty privates and send it to me at my email,

Of course, your pictures will be perfectly safe with me.  Mainly because to remain exempt from 2257 record keeping requirements pertaining to American websites, I can’t host images of nudity.

Of course, if you’d like to show off your handiwork and earn an extra five minutes, I’ll gladly point you to my esteemed Canadian associates at there’ll be even more free humiliation in it for you.

Look at that, it’s my birthday, and the gifts for you just keep coming.  Run along now. You have some trimming to do.

Makes you want more, doesn’t it? Come and get your Mistress Phone Sex,then.